I am off to Bournemouth in a little while for my friend's birthday, I'm very excited but also a little bit nervous. I find it sad that every time I'm going somewhere away from home, I feel a bit nervous and anxious about how I'm going to feel. Questions always run through my head, what if the pain gets unbearable? What if I need a nap? What if we go somewhere where there is a lot of walking involved? Obviously this is something I never had to worry about before I got ill. I won't let my illness hold me back though. I'm not going to feel any worse away than I will at home (I hope) and I know what I have to do if I do have a flare up of symptoms. My friends are understanding and I'm staying with a family I feel comfortable with so I can't see there being a problem!
So far today I am feeling fairly good. I had a long sleep to prepare myself for the 4 hour drive and am feeling pretty well rested for a change. We'll see how long that lasts once I get onto the motorway! I can feel the pain in my arms already building up but I'll make sure my painkillers are within easy reach in the car. I was meant to leave at 10, its now 10 past 11 and haven't even packed yet but I don't want to rush and stress myself out as this is when I start to feel worse.
We are going to an inflatable water park on a lake tomorrow which I can't wait for! I'm sure my body will hate it but I know my limitations so I'll be as careful as I can. I know it will be worth it anyway. We're then going for a meal for Emma's 21st before I have the long drive home on Monday. I'm so happy I am managing to get in my annual weekend away to the New Forest to Emma's, it wouldn't be summer without it! The holidays is the only time I can plan these weekends away as I need the recovery time afterwards.
This picture came up on my TimeHop this morning...
This is when I was taken ill on holiday this time 2 years ago. This is when my health problems seemed to start. After this, I felt quite tired for a long time though this did improve slightly. I also started having lots of problems with my stomach which kept getting dismissed as IBS. I spent a year off wheat and dairy and my stomach made a bit of an improvement but I then began to feel very tired again. I knew something was wrong but the doctors dismissed it all. There is more about this in my first blog post 'Diagnosis'. Up until last summer, I was able to do everything I could before but just felt more tired and achy. Now I'm much more limited but the aches are now full blown pain. It's sad to think I might still be completely healthy if this hadn't have happened on holiday but without proof this is the trigger, it is hard to tell.
I still wouldn't change anything and am happy (most of the time) :)
Need to go and pack now for my weekend! Hope you all have a good one xxxx
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