I've been back at work this week so I haven't had the chance to blog! I've obviously been very busy and exhausted with the early starts but I'm enjoying being back in a routine. I think routine helps me health-wise. Obviously I still feel awful everyday and the pain doesn't go away but it gives me a purpose and something to focus on.
On Monday night I barely slept while I was anticipating the pain of the first 6am alarm after six long weeks off! We had a conference day in a hotel with a cooked breakfast and buffet lunch included so this made it slightly more bearable. The day in itself was engaging and interesting so I didn't feel too bad. It was great to see everyone that I met when I started in July and met some new staff as well. We then had another conference on Wednesday with every school in the Trust which was a bit more painful for me being sat in a chair for hours being talked to. I enjoyed hearing about the other schools and spent time with the other NQT's (Newly Qualified Teachers) in my school. On Tuesday I was absolutely exhausted and could barely function in the evening but I felt a bit more alive on Wednesday and even managed a quick trip into the city with Adam since we finished at 2:30. However, by Thursday, my pain had increased and I had to go back on the codeine. Not ideal when I'd had a few days without it but sometimes its all I can do. We had a training day on the curriculum and time with the other teachers in the phase to get some planning done and finishing preparing our classrooms for the children's return on Friday - for those of you who don't know, I am a Year 1 teacher. I went to bed at 8 so I could at least have some chance of feeling refreshed in the morning.
Friday was fantastic. It was so lovely to see all the little ones faces again, seeing their new uniforms and how much they had grown! They did me proud and settled back into school with no issues at all. I felt pretty rough but I was so busy and enjoying my day and getting back into the swing of things. There is still a lot to sort out in the classroom and plenty of planning to be done but once I start properly teaching again tomorrow, things will fall into place.
Me and Adam had already decided we were going to go back to Essex to see my mum on Saturday and I woke up feeling fairly average so we set off mid afternoon. We had a lovely catch up with my mum and her fiancé, had a takeaway and a couple of drinks, watched X Factor and Austin Powers before settling down for the night.
I felt quite good when I went to sleep and expected to sleep well. This did NOT last. A couple of hours later I woke up with a tummy ache and I knew the IBS was flaring up again. I was annoyed that I'd been woken up and dragged myself to the toilet. Once I was in there, I have never experienced pain like it. My entire body felt like it was shutting down and I could not hold my own weight and had to use the towel rail to keep myself upright. I was sweating and shaking and all sorts were running through my head. I was absolutely terrified as it was the middle of the night, no one knew I was in the toilet in this excruciating pain and I couldn't physically get onto my feet and go back to the bedroom. I stayed there for about half an hour before it finally started to fade. I was getting to the point where I could see myself spending the night in hospital. It was that bad. My usual nerve and joint pain on a good day is around a 5, a bad day can range between 7 and 8, I've experience tummy pains at about an 8 before but this was a full blown 12. The worst pain I have ever felt and even as someone with chronic pain, I honestly didn't know it was possible to be in THAT much pain.
So obviously now I'm nervous about work tomorrow. I know I need to go in but its worrying me. This is probably making it worse so I'm trying to relax. I've taken my anti-spasm meds and am tucked up in bed writing this with my hot water bottle so fingers crossed I'll have a better night and better day tomorrow. The pain has gone down to a 6/7 but since I'm not used to it being this bad in my stomach, I'm struggling to function the way I do with my normal pain. I'm exhausted from being up most of the night so I'm hoping I can actually sleep tonight which should help too.
Hope everyone had a lovely weekend. As much as my stomach hurts, it didn't ruin my weekend and I had a lovely time at home! xxx
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